When I think back to when my Dad first got sick there is an image that always pops in my head. It's a simple picture. But it resonates within me as a profound symbol of so many things. Love. Friendship. Strength. Hope. Togetherness. It rocked my soul. It well...It made me view life a little differently. I wish I could put into words all the things I felt. I watched the moment unfold before my eyes and I just had to capture it. I knew then that it was a moment that would define the rest of my Dad's journey. I'll just let you see it and let you decide what you get from it.
They say behind every great man is a great woman but this picture shows why my Mom is the exception. She's never been the woman behind my Dad, she's always been beside him. Because of that my Mom is my hero.
A lot of people have a misconception about who suffers from cancer. To them, it's the patient, but it's also the one who is doing what my Mom is doing, standing beside the patient. Since the day my Dad was put into the hospital my Mom has been a rock. There have been times when they had to give us bad news but my Mom always stayed positive. She would always say that God was in control and He would take care of everything. And she meant it. I don't know how she does it. I have doubted God so many times through this, been angry at Him. Yelled at Him, even cursed. But never her. She's always praising Him, giving Him thanks for the things they do have. My Mom is incredible.
I think of how common Cancer is these days and it scares me to think of my husband getting it. It breaks me down. These days it seems more people do have it then don't, and it scares the hell out of me. Just thinking about it has me in tears. But my mom lives my biggest fear. And she does it with such strength and grace.
She might not be superhuman but she is as close as it gets. We've had some pretty deep talks, talks where she is worried, where she cries, and where I don't know what to say or how to console her, but she's not asking for that. She's just getting her feelings out, which is true strength.
I think of how common Cancer is these days and it scares me to think of my husband getting it. It breaks me down. These days it seems more people do have it then don't, and it scares the hell out of me. Just thinking about it has me in tears. But my mom lives my biggest fear. And she does it with such strength and grace.
She might not be superhuman but she is as close as it gets. We've had some pretty deep talks, talks where she is worried, where she cries, and where I don't know what to say or how to console her, but she's not asking for that. She's just getting her feelings out, which is true strength.
There have been times where I have asked her how she's doing and she says things like, "You're Dad is having a really good day today." or "We've had a rough day, but we'll get through it." When I ask how she is, she tells me how he is. She always puts herself second. She is vigilant in her cares for my Dad, the love of her life. Even in the middle of all of her duties as a wife, a Mother, a Grandmother, and a caregiver she finds time to fill this world with her love. She's taken time to stop and make sure a local homeless man had ways to get food and something to drink. She updates everyone on her and my Dad's adventures and heartaches. A week or two ago a man came to our house to see my Dad and was speaking of the Melanoma he has and all the different radiation treatments he's had. He told us he's not complaining though, because what my Dad is going through is far worse. Instead of leaving it at what he said my mom said, "No, that's your journey. Your battles are just as tough and just as important. We all have things we fight and they are just as important as the next person's." I loved hearing her say that. I loved knowing that woman with such wisdom was my mother. She doesn't get caught up in the "pity me" mindset. And she never belittles anyone's problems they are facing. Instead she lifts them up, with words and with prayer.
My Mother is a warrior. She is the woman spoken about in Proverbs 31. She's the woman who spends her days reminding Dad to drink his water. To not go out without his mask when he's neutrapenic and to make sure he doesnt overdo it when he's weak. To others it might sound like she nags at him about all the rules he has to follow. To me, she is being firm in her efforts to keep my Dad alive. And I will forever be thankful that she is so persistent on her "nagging."
My mother does so many things just to help my Dad get by day to day that no one sees. She does things that don't make sense to other people, but to her they are things that are necessary for my Dad to have a good day. And she might not think that anyone sees them, but I do, Mom. I do.
